He leaned out, and I thought he was going to ask me for directions, but instead he asked me how old I was. ‘Damn, you got some big titties for such a little girl.’ He made this gross smacking sound with his lips, and sped away. “I want to know,” she asks, “why do older men hit on younger women?

While most men and women alike are appalled by stories of adult men hitting on 12-year-olds, we still assume that men will “naturally” lust after young women just a few years older.

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“It’s not just me,” she adds, “it happens to most of my friends, almost regardless of what they look like or what they’re wearing.

It makes me feel like I can’t trust anyone, like all men want just one thing. ”♦◊♦I’ve been writing and researching about relationships between older men and younger women since 2005.

While the media is hyping the “cougar” phenomenon, they ignore the reality that in most age-disparate affairs the man is the older (sometimes, as in the case of Hugh Hefner, astoundingly older) partner.

We take it for granted that many men in their 30s, 40s, and 50s will be more sexually attracted to younger women than to their peers.

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